Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops