roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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Golf.

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Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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