What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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