Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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if your in a wheelchair have no hair because of cancer and are being fed through a tube you should wait a couple of years before ending it. and wrinkles into the equation....... BANG

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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H o m o comes out as homo

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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what bounces and is blue all over? a blue bouncy ball

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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