Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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