a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

Anti-jokes are funny.

A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

What did John name his dog? Doggy

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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