What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

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i dont fisish anythi

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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