A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

there once was a black man who played basketball

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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