A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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star wars kid

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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