What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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