Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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1 error prohibited this post from being saved There were problems with the following fields: * Body can't be blank

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Where can I apply for janitor school?

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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What? Huh?

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies. I'd rather had the porsche in my garage

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops