There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969 i like potatos 696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

a black man pays his child support

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -27

So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what's brown and sticky? A Stick

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

thumb_up thumb_down -29

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops