hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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