An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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