why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

How many athiests does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

did you hear about the fly on the toilet? i heard he got pissed off!

"Hey, did you hear that the Dungbeetles got a divorce? They live in California so she got half his shit."

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...