hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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