what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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