A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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A man did not like this site

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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it was all Tagart

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Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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