What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

Only in your math books can Carlos buy 14 cantaloupes without hus sanity being questioned.

Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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