What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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