What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops