roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

A gay man,a black woman,a seven year old child,a liberal,an atheist and an asian walk into a building. A hijacked plane flies into the tower they were in and kills them all on a cold September morning.

What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

I'm rick james bitch

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? Twister

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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