Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

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Women's rights

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

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Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

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Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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gays

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

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When is the right time to have sex with a 16 year old? After consent from her parents

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where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

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What is a dog? Bark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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