Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

If life throws you lemons Catch them

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

Women rights..

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

where's waldo? in a picture book.

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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