Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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knock knock you may come in

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What's 9 +10 19

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Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

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Why did the chicken cross the park? To get to the other slide.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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