My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops