1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

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What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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say it ten times fast: oh

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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