Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

25

What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

God is real.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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