Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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