Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

i committed murder

So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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