What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? It is unlikely that this situation would occur, as tractors are very large objects and losing one would be very hard, furthermore, tractors are vital agricultural vehicles and most farmers would take care in not misplacing one.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

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Who won the race through the underpass, the black man or the polish man? The black man as he crossed the finish line several seconds earlier.

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What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Why did we invade Afghanistan? Because we hate arabs.

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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