A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DONT THUMBS UP THIS LIKE POST THIS ON 20 MESSAGES OR YOU'RE BEST MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

69.

what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

rarw

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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