im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

What was Hellen Keller's dogs name? dhfgbvskjne How did Hellen Keller's dog die? Natural causes.

Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

penis

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

why did you poop because you are a poop

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...