What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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Roses are red.

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why was the black man on the bus? cause he needed to get to work

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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George W. Bush

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

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penis. nuff said.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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