What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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the WNBA.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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