chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops