Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops