How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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a drunk man got 3 beers and a 5 whiskys

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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