What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your mom is so old she died

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

pull my finger (farts)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

thumb_up thumb_down +9

So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops