A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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