What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

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mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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