Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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a little boy and a pedophile are walking in the woods. it is late at night and therefore very dark. the little boy turns to the pedophile.and says "gee mister, it sure is scary out here." the pedophile responds "yeah, and your'e going to get raped"

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Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

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why did the boy poop his pants Yhe Holocaust

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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What's green and wheels? Your mom.

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Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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