How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A baby seal walks into a club

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops