knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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Kenny G

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What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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A cathlic priest walks into a bar, but realizes there are no young boys hr could pickup.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

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look at there!! an entire dog!!

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops