What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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kennah campion... being nice

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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What is Jason? Black.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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gays

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i like potatoes

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

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What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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What is a dog? Bark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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