What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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What time is it? 10:58

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Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

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why do anti jokes suck???? Because CC is Jewish and rapes orphan squirrels EJ

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

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i saw a garbage truck it had garbage in it

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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