what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

Small breasts.

Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

Ruller

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

I got shot, you laughed

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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