What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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a little boy and a pedophile are walking in the woods. it is late at night and therefore very dark. the little boy turns to the pedophile.and says "gee mister, it sure is scary out here." the pedophile responds "yeah, and your'e going to get raped"

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What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

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whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

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potato

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What's the difference between above job and below job? Below job sucks

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

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How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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