Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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Carlton

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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The government makes a good decision

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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