Carlton

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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The government makes a good decision

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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