A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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A pornstar walks into a church, she has remained close to Christ despite her condescending career choice.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

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All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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Kate

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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A black man killed someone

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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