What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti jokes are funny

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

Brett Farve

GRAAAAAAAR.

Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

Potato salad

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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