A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

Dani Barton = Stupid

whats pink and fluffy? candy floss.

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

arse

What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

your all shit at jokes

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

When is the right time to have sex with a 16 year old? After consent from her parents

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

i like potatoes

Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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