What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

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Why Because

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Obama

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Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

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Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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