whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

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penis

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

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What has nine arms and sucks? An appendage-rich octopus with an inhaling habit.

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why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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Your mom is so old, -just kidding. I know she died at a young age.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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That's unfortunate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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