a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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69

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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