How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

Myspace

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...