Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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ekoj

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George W. Bush

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GEOVANI is a queer that dosen't believe me

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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Chuck Norris died.

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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Today I exchanged money for Meth. There is no joke here. I'm a drug addict

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe. -Tag

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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