Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

A baby seal walks into a club...

Kenny G

What's red and silly? A blood clot

Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? I cried when I cut up the onion.

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

whats red and looks like a bucket a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket a red bucket in diguise

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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