A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

What's green and wheels? Your mom.

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

Why Because

What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

Potato salad

I got shot, you laughed

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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