Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

What is the difference between Jews and the boyscouts? The boyscouts come home from camp.

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? cancer.

Rick Perry.

Why are we posting shit jokes on here? Because we can't drink!

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

Well, this is fun.

Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

Knock knock Nobody's home.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

So, this one time, I was at the grocery store. Man, that was nuts.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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