Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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i have aids and a chode

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blubber vaginass CC

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Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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