Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? who cares even if they could screw it in it wouldnt work because there to poor to aford electricity

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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to see a bad joke look above

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops