Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops