A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

thumb_up thumb_down -13

One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i love................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................ ME

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

poopy is poopy

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

thumb_up thumb_down -13

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops