roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

what bounces and is blue all over? a blue bouncy ball

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

A seal walks into a club.

Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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