What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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