What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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Tunechi

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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knock knock who`s there me oh come in

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops