Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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69.

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

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What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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