Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops