Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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how much fish could a chicken

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops