What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

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Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops