What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

A blonde, a Jew, and a black man all went to the store. They each bought their groceries and went home to enjoy the rest of their day with their families.

whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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