roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops