How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops