The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

Bitch

How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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