Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

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A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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What did the girl say when she was hit by a train? Nothing she exploded on impact

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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