- Anti Joke

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

** * * ** * * ? I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was ** hilarious.

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

Your adopted

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

** * * ** * * ? I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was ** hilarious.

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

Your adopted

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

Your adopted

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

** * * ** * * ? I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was ** hilarious.