What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

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How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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