why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -26

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

You want to hear a joke? Republican

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is this joke funny It isn't

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops