How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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