Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops