What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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