What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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