'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

What rhymes with milk...milf

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

Obama lin Baden.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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