How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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why is the black guy cross the rode. he did not' he got in a truck. i know it does not make s...

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What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

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Why didn't the boy cross the road? Because there was traffic moving at high speed and he didn't want to be paralyzed from the waist down

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops