Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

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THEN WHO WAS FONE?

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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knock,knock you suck

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a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

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A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops