Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

womans having rights.

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

your mum

A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

miha kako si?

What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

Knock Knock Come in

The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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