Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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