There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

Puns are terrible. I love them.

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

what did jacob say to coach a joke

What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

Your girlfriend.

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...