Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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How do you kill a black man There is many ways

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Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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