I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What's the deal with airline food... It has to be packaged and prepared in such a way large quantities of people can eat the meal with minimal preparation, which results in lower quality. If you don't like it, order a drink from the cart.

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

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Bumsniffer

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

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cliché rebecca black joke.

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops