I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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A baby seal walks into a club

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knock knock you may come in

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

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Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

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- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

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Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops