Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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American healthcare.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

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blubber vaginass CC

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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ekoj

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Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Womens rights.

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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The Aristocrats

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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Knock knock Who's there? The police your son died in a car wreck.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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