A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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to see a bad joke look above

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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I got shot, you laughed

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What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops