Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

Child Prostitution.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

knock knock you may come in

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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