Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

I like jokes.

Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...