your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

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Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

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Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

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Child Prostitution.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

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why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops