Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

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Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

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I got shot, you laughed

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Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

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Rick Perry.

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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American healthcare.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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blubber vaginass CC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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