What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

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The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Why don't chicken wear underwear? Because their peckers are on their face

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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Hey, you have small hands.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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You know what's funny about table salt? Not much.

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PENIS

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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