Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

What is the difference between Jews and the boyscouts? The boyscouts come home from camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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