what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Hey Patrick Yea? I found something funnier then 24 Give to me buddy 25

In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

I got shot, you laughed

Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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