You are the third derivative of the position function.

What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

what is patrick wilson? smart

A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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