What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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The jets are a good team..

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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Women's rights

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Is Carly smart? No.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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