Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Oh...okay, good.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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the cow goes moo

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why did the chicken cross the road

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops