Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -6

if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I wish I Charlie Sheen's Dealer.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I like jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

That's unfortunate.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How Many Friends Did The Ginger Kid Have? None.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +115

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +45

So a baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A black guy walks in to a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops