Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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blubber vaginass CC

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops