A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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Rick Perry.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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Well, this is fun.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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No joke.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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A black succeeds

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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