Look at your hand. Made you look!

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What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

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Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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PEN15 IF U R SMART U WILL UNDERSTAND THIS

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What is a dog? Bark

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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