yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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Rick Perry.

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A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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Well, this is fun.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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The jets are a good team..

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A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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American healthcare.

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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No joke.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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