Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

Two guys were sitting in a pub.

What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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