Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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kennah campion... being nice

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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blubber vaginass CC

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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