How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Goat balls.

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what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

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A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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A. Hey.. B. Hi

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LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

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Knock Knock Come in!

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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What's 9 +10 19

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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