Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

What did the guy say to the mushroom?

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

does this look unsure to you?

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

The Aristocrats

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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