Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

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Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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