Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

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An antijoke

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cc

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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