Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

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little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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