Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

Ben is gay

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

Wana hear something dirty? Mud

Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

Knock Knock Come in!

A baby seal walks into a club

What what In the butt

Kenny G

Hey Patrick Yea? I found something funnier then 24 Give to me buddy 25

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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