Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

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Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

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Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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blubber vaginass CC

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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You.

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A man is on anti jokes, he is not laughing.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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