Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

why did the chicken cross the road

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

Ruller

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

If life hands you lemons Take them

George W. Bush

A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

knock knock go away

Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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