Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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American healthcare.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

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What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

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What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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To pen state administraters walk into a butt

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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