So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

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Scott

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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Kenny G

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9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

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A fish walks into a bar

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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