what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

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What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

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Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

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Ben is gay

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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