Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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Why did the woman die Because she was old

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What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

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What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

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What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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