A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

thumb_up thumb_down -80

crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

thumb_up thumb_down -136

WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Goat balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Two guys were sitting in a pub.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops