Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Dani Barton = Stupid

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A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

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Global Warming.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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You.

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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women's rights

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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