What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

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An antijoke

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Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

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What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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