knock knock go away

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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Why did the woman die Because she was old

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What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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PEN15 IF U R SMART U WILL UNDERSTAND THIS

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

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am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

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France never surrender.

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yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

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What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

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"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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P0P T4Rt

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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