Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A dwarf walks under a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The awkward when you said moment in your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops