There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

Potato salad

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

womens rights

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

No.

ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

Hahahahahhaha...................................black people

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...