Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

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How do you cure AIDS? You can't.

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A joke

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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A scottish man having fun

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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Women's rights

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Dallas Cowboys

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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