This site is hilarious oh wait...

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What makes the world go round? Gravity.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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women's rights

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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wat?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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