Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

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What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

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A man walks into a bar.

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

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An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

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What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

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Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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Is your refrigerator running? No. Oh perfect, I'm a refrigerator repairman, I'll be right over.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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